I’m tired. I’m having a lot of difficulty just focusing on the computer monitor to type this. I keep yawning every couple minutes, and my eyes sting with fatigue. The odd thing is, I’ve slept recently, but I guess I’m just not getting very good sleep. Friday night I went to bed kind of late because of playing EQ with the husband, but I got to sleep in a bit Saturday before Sarah and Jessica’s graduation ceremony. I have to remember to give them copies of the pictures I took. At any rate, DnD wasn’t too busy Saturday; we just finished up a module and ate a hella lot of taquitos and salsa. I ate a lot of marshmallows (No, I’m not pregnant. I see nothing wrong with eating marshmallows and taquitos. I also see nothing wrong with peanut butter/salami/American cheese sandwiches, but I’ve been told that’s insane too) and between the marshmallows and the springtime SAD, I got pretty manic and hyper. Ian eventually told me to go to bed, but I didn’t sleep. Just laid awake for hours thinking up songs and stories and listening to the noise downstairs. Sunday I got up mid-morning and played EQ with Ian for a few hours after he got up. Then we took naps, and then there was more EQ playing, and I finally went to bed around midnight. Didn’t fall asleep for about an hour, but I went to bed anyway.

I guess that’s a big part of my problem: I don’t sleep much when I’m in bed. It takes me anywhere from a half hour to an hour or more to actually fall asleep, and then I don’t tend to stay that way. Dreams wake me up or exhaust me, Ian coming to bed sometimes wakes me up and I have to go through the whole “falling asleep” process again, and then there are the mornings that I just inexplicably wake up and can’t fall back to sleep for no reason despite it being five or six in the morning. Most mornings, I wake up feeling more exhausted than when I went to bed. I wish I knew what was wrong with me. Groggy days and restless nights drive me nuts. I bounce between getting decent sleep for about a week to having really crappy sleep for a week or two at a time, sometimes for a month. Is it the mattress? The pillows? The temperature? Noise? Light? I haven’t been drinking tea much lately, especially not in the evening, so it isn’t caffeine. Saturday night can easily be explained away by all the sugar and hyperness, but that’s one night in a year that something like that happens. I’m seriously beginning to think that I need to start having a nightcap, you know, get a bottle of vodka and do a shot just before bed every night. Goddamned insomnia. Oh, how I hate it.

On a fairly unrelated note, Heather and I have our closet pretty well reorganized now. Since I still have about nine shots left on the roll of film in Ian’s camera after graduation, I figure I’ll try to get a few pics of the new room to post. Sarah and Jessica got to see it last Friday when I was here by myself because all the other advisors had left for a three-hour wine-drinking lunch, so they know how small it is. At least now I have my computer and desk set up. I just wish my knees weren’t acting up so bad. It started Saturday at the graduation ceremonies because I couldn’t really move my legs, and that much immobility really fucks up my arthritis. I could barely climb the stairs yesterday because my right knee hurt so much. Now it’s both knees and my left hip. I’m fucking old. I’ll be sore tomorrow as well because of all the moving, plus the fact that I have to run to the bank for quarters then spend the entire evening in the laundromat washing clothes. I’m out of bras, pretty well out of underwear, and I’m sure Ian’s out of everything. We really need to start saving up for a new washer. At least doing laundry at the laundromat means everything gets done all at once rather than spending an entire day doing load after load at home. Still sucky though having to be out in public.

So there’s my day/weekend/life/whatever. I’m going to work on the Planner this afternoon, I guess, and probably start work on making schedules for in-coming freshmen. I’m happy to have my computer back though. That’s a little ray of sunlight since we don’t have windows and can’t get any other sunlight in here now. Goddamn.